I love to provoke, however considerately and loving, to better people, and when I meet people who want to insist on them having a bad day, I ask them:
"Was it a bad day, or was it a bad five minutes that you milked all day?
To develop as human beings we need, what coaches call, an appropriate disruption in our own little world. Is the disruption we make too big or too small the person we are coaching be unable to use it for anything. That's why it is all about understanding and acknowledging the person we are sitting across.
In this book I am not sitting across anybody - and that's why you'll think, that this is really good and I can really use this, but this has nothing to do with me, and I can't use that for anything - but this might just be the appropriate disruption in someone else's little world.